Hello again from wonderful Winnipeg (which is such a nice place to come home to).
I love how being away for a while gives everything a special newness upon returning. Particularly in spring and early summer, when the plants are just starting to show their true colours and fullness. But coming home in general is something incredible, if you pay attention and can adopt a certain perspective. “Hey look – it’s my fridge! I can do laundry any time I want! Holy cow – I’m so excited to be doing dishes!” Every comfort of home feels brand new and luxurious. Every meal made by my own hands seems to taste better and better. I just want to lay on the floor and enjoy the home-ness of it. (Also, I may live in my Jack Skellington booty slippers for a while.)
As I’ve eased back into reality, two things have been prominent in my thoughts:
1) Reflection after reflection of appreciation for all of the wonderful things that the last month has had to offer in my direction. (I had a blast at the Release Concert and although the roller coaster of life has been full of twists and turns, I also feel like I haven’t stopped celebrating since.)
The first of several videos from Renegade’s release: Advice!
2) Dad. With yesterday being Father’s Day and tomorrow being his birthday (he would have been 63), I’ve been thinking a lot about having him in my life for a season, and what he might be thinking TODAY about all that I’ve been moving toward. It occurred to me that he would have measured success by my adventures more than their outcomes. And this made me smile.
Anyway, in case you’re wondering about the rest of my adventures in Western Canada… let’s start with Calgary.
I had a blast making noise for an intimate audience at Wine-Ohs and met a fabulous sound guy/bartender/bass player/server/all-around-good-guy: Tom C Smith.
— Dan St.Yves (@thatdanguy1) June 16, 2015
The following day, I drove to Moose Jaw, SK to work with some unbelievably creative students at RuBarb Productions!
Also, the kind folks at Panda Auto Service took a look at my car and discovered warped rotors were the reason my steering wheel started shaking when stopping at high speeds in the mountains. They fixed me up and I have been good to go ever since. (If you are in Moose Jaw and your vehicle needs help, go there. They are kind.) :)
Back to RuBarb: working with such expressive, fun and experimental students was an absolute highlight of this tour.
We wrote three songs, which can be heard here:
I then drove to Regina (in my sweet, safe car) where I met drummer, Ted Crawford at The Artful Dodger. We played two fun sets together and before the last song, confessed to our audience that it was, in fact, our FIRST time playing together. Ever! (Ted is such a pro.) I stayed with his amazing family who were so fun to be around, shared my love for Mitch and fed me full of yummy things before sending me on my way home.
All in all, everywhere I went on this tour, people were nothing but kind to me. Whether with venues, hotels, arts organizations, young people or the generous folks who opened their homes to me, I saw nothing but wonderfulness. There are too many examples to list, but a few that stand out were: the gentleman in Moose Jaw who lovingly washed the bugs off my car as I watched, the gal with the cool rubber boots at the gas station in Nanton who noticed my tattoo and had so much positivity to send my way, the spanish dudes (also in Nanton) who took the time to make sure I was okay after they saw the smoke emanating from my tailpipe… and the reconnections with people from my past to whom I had the opportunity to present my new self (who is also still very much my old self but with new stories). These were some of the most interesting parts of my experiences on the road this time around.
There were moments I won’t forget, like playing cribbage with two sisters and visiting with two nieces…
… who gave me many gifts, such as a big purple bow for my door, pipe cleaners, new songs, dim sum and a jade plant…
… and it was so much fun connecting with new people who could not have been more supportive. I found beauty in mountains and oceans; everywhere! I also found out more about myself.
I was reacquainted with my persistence when dealing with the challenges of the road:
- trying to address my “life needs” while making art happen and living out of a car
- dealing with easy and difficult access to load into venues (and doing so alone)
- learning to follow my inner voice more instinctively when making moment by moment decisions about where to go next or when or how to manage the details
- developing better systems and habits to keep my posture and pace consistent with who I want to be
- ENJOYING EVERY MOMENT
After all, what is the point of all this effort in the direction of introducing myself to the world while exploring all that it has to offer… if I’m not going to love, enjoy and savour the experience? I know now that this is my life’s work – to focus more on what I want and love than what I don’t. And I’m getting better at doing that under pressure. And I’m even becoming more kind to myself when I’m not doing that very well, or as well as I would like.
(Dad would say, “Never let anybody “should” on you. Now, who is should-ing on Lindsey? Is Lindsey should-ing on Lindsey?” And I would smile and nod and contemplate how NOT to approach myself that way.) I think letting go of this strange, old view is revolutionizing my existence because I am easier on everyone and everything as I’m easier on myself.
I didn’t write it in my notebook because I was driving, but here’s what sang in my head as I moved toward Vancouver:
No direction but one, is where I’m going…
to say what I have come so far to say.
And I won’t be early or late. And it will have been worth the wait.
No direction but one… following the setting sun.
Thanks for caring enough to follow and be a part of the journey. Can’t wait to share the next step with you.
P.S. Listen… Read… Follow… Watch…